


Four hearts for the two of us

by Wibbili_Wobbly



Series: THE STRANGER FROM GALLIFREY [6]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alien Cultural Differences, Aliens, Bad Humor, F/M, Future, Gen, Space Flight
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:00:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26336077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wibbili_Wobbly/pseuds/Wibbili_Wobbly
Summary: What can a really bad joke turn into?
Series: THE STRANGER FROM GALLIFREY [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1686751





	Four hearts for the two of us

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Четыре сердца на двоих](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26335942) by [Wibbili_Wobbly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wibbili_Wobbly/pseuds/Wibbili_Wobbly). 



The blue police box appeared in a small dark room. A few seconds later the Doctor looked out.

'Just some utility room', he announced and took a few steps out of the TARDIS, 'You see, Martha Jones: materialising on the railroad straight before the rushing train is rather a rare exception', he said significantly.

'Okay, so where are we now?' Martha crossed her arms and smiled.

'Year 3815, Astoria spacecraft. We are now on one of the poshest and the most luxurious cruises in the entire universe!' the Time Lord smiled back.

'So what are we waiting for?'

It was indeed a luxurious intergalactic vessel with huge bright halls and long corridors. The whole one wall of each corridor was fully equipped for a giant aquarium, which extended into the wall for unknown depth. Every aquarium was filled with aquatic creatures from all over the universe. Although Martha could swear than she spotted common earthling crabs there too.

These huge water reservoirs we're just a small part of all the exquisite wonders and features of the pompous vessel.   
The immense halls were full of alien passengers from different parts of space. Obviously, the richest ones. After all, not any creature could afford to get on such ship. But the power of the Doctor's psychic paper was truly hard to overestimate.

'Do you like this?' Doctor asked Martha, who was looking around enthusiastically, 'I think I should show you the place where all the most incredible adventures begin'

'The pilot's cabin?'

'The bar'

***

As soon as Doctor and Martha sat down at the long bar, a small screen opened in front of them. Martha glanced around in search of any staff but the screen was doing perfectly. It scanned automatically the clients' preferences and wishes.

'But where's at least one bartender?' the girl asked.

'Hm?' the Doctor distracted from his cocktail with a straw, 'There's no need. This ship doesn't require any living staff at all. Complete mechanisation. Here it is — the great and lazy future'

Martha was about to object but then her cocktail came out of the bar too. The girl decided that it wasn't so bad.

'You know...' Doctor was just about to start a very long monologue about what a powerful engine of progress laziness was, but he suddenly got interrupted.

Somewhere behind there was a fuss. Looked like there was a scuffle starting over there. The Time Lord jerked to intervene in the conflict but Martha besieged him immediately.

'Don't even think of that. You've brought us here to rest. Do you even know how to relax calmly?'

'Calmly is boring. Something's going on there, see?'

'Promise me that at least once you will not meddle'

'What's wrong with you, Martha Jones?..'

No sooner had he uttered it, a man fell from somewhere in front of them on the bar counter.

'Jack?!' the Time Lord jerked.

'Doctor! Martha!'

Captain Jack Harkness smiling cheerfully deftly climbed down from the counter and stared at the one who had so successfully thrown him to his old friends. It was a pale blue wrinkled alien with a huge head.

'So what did you messed up with again?' whispered the Doctor without taking his eyes off the aggressive alien.

'Nothing', captain Jack replied, 'I asked if he had to pay extra when ordering hats. I didn't think this guy would be offended'

***BEEP***

Among the endless noise of aliens, no one noticed a single beep.

The Doctor managed to settle the conflict peacefully.   
Captain Jack was meanwhile talking to Martha about life and work.   
As soon as the Time Lord came back, Jack immediately hugged him with a joyful exclamation.

'Oh, don't even start', the Doctor dismissed, 'How did you get here?'

'Me? Torchwood's assignment', said the man proudly, 'Shame I can't tell you the details. Well, you know, secret information', with an assumed riddle he narrowed his eyes.

'Oh, come on, can't you tell at least a bit?' asked Martha disappointedly.

'Well, I can only tell you that we're all very lucky to be on this chic vessel at someone else's expense. Besides, there are many guest celebrities here — and this is just something. The entertaining programme here is simply brilliant. Have you ever heard of the _Roaming Voice_? No? Oh, you've missed a lot. She is the legendary space singer. It is believed that she is acknowledged to be the best singer in five galaxies. And until this moment no one has seen her face. I think it would be worth getting to know her a bit closer', Jack winked at the Doctor but the Time Lord only rolled his eyes.

'Not interested', he grunted and Martha was unexpectedly very happy about this. Finally, no one will steal the attention of her incredible companion.

***

Music came suddenly out of nowhere and it seemed to fill all the place. Everyone fell silent and was just listening to the wondrous and gentle singing of a pure female voice.

The Doctor frowned and stared intently at the floor.

'Do you like it? This is that same lady. It is believed that when she is singing, her trills are transmitted straight to your brain', Jack grinned.

Out of sudden, the Doctor jerked away ignoring everybody. It just came to him that he must run. This voice seemed so familiar, like a word that you know for sure but can't remember. The Time Lord realised that it became just vital for him to find the source of these sounds. He was running until he bumped into translucent doors.

The Doctor found himself in a huge hall crowded will all possible alien listeners. The walls with fitted aquariums were giving a weak light and, together with the floor, filling the place with dim light reflections.

In the middle of the stage, she was standing — the main precious of the moment and undoubtedly the main decoration of the ship. The Roaming Voice. She looked so elegant and sophisticated that the Doctor couldn't take his eyes off her. He was staring in fascination at the barefoot singer in a shimmering purple dress that echoed so poetically with the glitter of the stars in her cosmic purple eyes. She was sliding her gaze across the hall giving out unearthly trills into her... Sonic screwdriver, which apparently was being used as a microphone.

The Doctor unmistakably recognised the Stranger in this singer. This was her. The Time Lady immediately stopped him in the crowd as if she had known in advance that he would be somewhere there. In fact, she always expects the Doctor to be somewhere there.

The song came to its end and the audience burst into thunderous applause. But the performer didn't hear all this. Her gaze was directed to the Time Lord, who was watching her motionlessly with his deep brown eyes.

***

'Why does the chicken cross the road? ... To get to the other side!' the Stranger burst into laughter.

***BEEP***

Perhaps even this old and awkward joke could be quite successful. But the Stranger's interlocutor turned out to be an alien from a very distant constellation. It was a creature with a chicken's head, who clearly didn't appreciate the joke making an unpleasant sound.

'C'mon, didn't you like that? Okay, here's another one. Why does the duck cross the ro...' the Time Lady didn't manage to finish the phrase.

'I guess, that's enough. Can we have a moment? Excellent', emerging from the crowd the Doctor quickly grabbed the Stranger by the arm and dragged her away.

'Hey, what are you doing? They didn't even listen to the end!'

'I know, they'll thank me later'

The Time Lords stopped in the middle of the hall, lost in the crowd of intergalactic passengers.

'So how did you end up here?'

'Don't ask me how. Can't you see?' the Stranger raised her eyebrows, 'I'm on a tour. I earn money. Oh, by the way...' she cleared her throat, turned on the Sonic on the speakerphone and turned to everyone, 'Dear passengers! The Roaming Voice wishes you a wonderful time on this ship and reminds you that throughout the voyage you can purchase recordings of the songs that will be composed and released in the next five years. See for more information on distributing points. Don't miss your chance to get a rare exclusive from the future. Have a nice time!'

The Doctor was watching these actions with scepticism.

'By the way, I didn't know you could sing like that. It was very... _bearable_ ', not that the Time Lord forgot how to pronounce the word _"marvellous"_. He just decided not to indulge his friend's vanity one more time.

' _Bearable?_ ' she narrowed her eyes, 'Really? Well, yes, perhaps', the Stranger realised that the Doctor would never praise her and it had nothing to do with her singing. For some reason, this evasion even flattered her but for decency, she put on an offended look, '15 years on the Ood planet. That's it'

'I didn't know the Ood had their own planet...' the Doctor raised his eyebrows, 'The last time Rose and I met them on a spaceship. But back then these creatures were nothing but an obedient workforce'

'You didn't know? But they said you had saved and freed their kind... Oops, messed up with the timelines again', she shrugged, 'Oh, and I'm also here to meet John Lennon. The Beatles are having a release of their new single on this ship today. They've composed something nice again'

'But...'

'A hologram', the Stranger explained, 'Already for a long time a smart device has been creating new tracks based on real songs. And holographic images always present them. Truly immortal group. It's so lovely and John is almost like the real one! However...' the Stranger wilted but continued to smile, 'Every time after a performance the system is restarted. And after that their memories automatically disappear. On the one hand, it's cool 'cause I can get to know John over and over again like the first time. But on the other hand... Nobody remembers me again. Oh, nurse!'

The Doctor turned around. Martha was already behind. She finally managed to find him. At the sight of the Stranger, the smile disappeared from the girl's face.

'Hi, hmmm...'

'Stranger. I know, I myself hate names but at least one of them you could have bothered to remember, couldn't you? Oh, by the way!' the Time Lady turned to the Doctor again, forgetting about his companion, 'Most recently I was in year 102004, just when the first museum of time machines on the Earth was opened. Nothing special, but that'll do with a glass of warm beer. So, can you imagine what I've found at the stand with the first developments, huh? The schemes made by that ginger boy from my shop! Gnarled, incomprehensible and mostly useless — but still! And thanks to them in the distant future the first time machine on Earth was constructed! Well then, at least he learned something from me. And this was me who inspired him', claimed the former Madam Pilgrim proudly. She clearly expected praise, which, however, didn't follow.

Both Martha and the Doctor realize that the greatest invention came out of a real **_tragedy_**. For centuries that guy was believed to be just some crazy scientist who died alone having served his whole life to pseudoscience.   
But the Doctor and his companion knew the story of a poor loverboy Archie, who, even having lost his memories, was ready to do any kind of madness just to see his lost Madam again. Archie didn't realise but definitely felt that he needed that machine. For something vital. Something immeasurably greater than some kind of **_life_** — even **_his own_** one.

Martha suddenly got a strange feeling of fear. After all, since the very beginning, she's been associating herself with that ginger guy from "Pilgrim's Corner Shop". Does that mean that sooner or later she will end up like this? Fortunately, the girl didn't have time to delve into these doomy thoughts. Someone abruptly hugged her and she got distracted.

'Here I am', it was captain Jack Harkness again.

'Oh, just stop it', the Doctor rolled his eyes.

Jack looked at the shoeless singer and smiled charmingly.

'Let me introduce myself: captain Jack Harkness', he gallantly kissed the girl's hand. The Stranger appreciated the gesture.

The Doctor groaned in exhaustion and Martha crossed her arms in displeasure. The Stranger noticed this too.

'Captain Jack?' asked the Time Lady and then sang: ' _Hey you Captain Jack Bring me back to the railroad track..._ Oh, sorry, it's just the song came to my mind', she smiled softly, 'Well, I suppose you've heard of me. Yes, I'm that same Roaming Voice. And what has brought you here to this unusual ship, captain?'

'Oh, right!' Jack perked up, 'I work for Torchwood. The organisation that deals with alien interference on planet Earth. You may have heard of that. The Earth is generally a great place!'

'No doubt it is', the Time Lady smiled.

'So I'm here on a secret mission. I'm to track down an intruder. She is registered as a potential threat to the planet. She was involved in suspicious activity. Including interference in the course of the French Revolution, an offshoot into a parallel universe somewhere at the beginning of the 20th century, anachronisms in the 60s, the spread of a dangerous virus and much more'

'Hey! You said you couldn't tell anything about the mission', Martha was indignant but Jack shrugged in confusion.

'Really? I don't remember that. So', he continued, 'The wanted calls herself **the Stranger**. By the way, have you heard anything about her?'

The Time Lady glanced nervously all over the ship. Martha was about to blurt out something but the Doctor shoved her lightly not letting to reveal the Stranger. At least for now.

'Humm... No', replied the Roaming Voice, 'What a nasty mademoiselle she is. So you don't even know what she looks like?'

'There's not a piece of single integral evidence left'

'Well, not an easy one. Anyway, if she really is here, then she'll probably do something weird', the Stranger giggled awkwardly and hurried to change the topic: 'Oh, by the way, do you know that this is not an ordinary spaceship?'

'That's right, I heard it was reconstructed from another, more ancient intergalactic vessel', added Jack not missing a single chance to demonstrate his erudition.

'And not just from an old ship. Its main peculiarity is that it was restored upside down due to the idea of the chief engineer. So we can say that we are walking on the ceiling of an ancient vessel'

Jack noticed the intelligence of the Time Lady and was exceptionally pleased with how quickly and easily she went on contact.

'You know how to make a very nice impression'

'Well, you know, I'm a kind of _Casanova_ myself'

***

The Stranger and Jack were walking along the hall. They both seemed to be completely engaged in the conversation. And this at least worried Doctor and Martha.   
The Doctor felt something unpleasant that he had not noticed before when Jack showed attention to some else. The Time Lord was maddened by this.

Martha was annoyed by the fact that some unbearable snob from the space conquered all men again. Moreover, that space lady attracted the attention of the Doctor, who instead of usual running around the ship was glaring at these two.

The travellers entered a large hall where the food was served. Sort of a buffet for all passengers on the ship. It seemed that absolutely everything was there! Exquisite delicacies from all the universe had been collected there.

The Stranger immediately grabbed some brightly glowing cupcake and bit it. The Time Lady noticed another giant aquarium in the entire wall, which adorned this hall too.   
She went closer to the glass and peered into the water. Among the creatures that swarmed there, she noticed a salmon, as if from the Earth, and smiled warmly.

'This one brings up good memories... Back when I was Marie Antionette I had a lot of cute baby salmon'

'So I see, you like salmon?' Jack walked over her again, 'How about some delicious salmon fried on the Zigon fire?' he handed her a plate of fried fish

The Stranger turned pale in an instant. Her face turned white as a sheet. And although she knew for sure that nothing so terrible was happening, she seemed to be paralysed.   
Somewhere in the subconscious, the faint echoes of memories of something horrible began to stir again. Her eyes turned wet.

'I... I shall be away for a little while', the Tima Lady stammered in a trembling voice, 'I need to go to the toilet. My... My screwdriver...' she never came up with any excuse and rushed away past the worried Doctor and perplexed Martha.

'What? Her... Screwdriver? It that a lady with a surprise or am I missing something?' Jack looked after her bewilderedly.

The Stranger ran into some dark room and clung to the wall, literally falling on it exhaustedly. The Time Lady was intimidated by this incomprehensible and illogical reaction, which somehow seemed so correct. Something lurked in the depth of her soul, beyond her understanding and memory.

***

'Look what you've done', the Doctor said condemningly.

'Women', Jack shrugged, 'But I know them very well. So I'm not going after her. And I still didn't get where and why she suddenly ran away'

Martha rolled her eyes. The Doctor winced and looked down at his feet.

'It seems that we'd better find her and calm her down', everyone followed his stare and noticed the water on the floor.

'Hah, well, I may have occurred to be the reason of women's tears', Jack grinned, 'But never have I been literally drowning in them'

***BEEP***

'Can anyone else hear this beeping?' Martha asked but the Doctor dismissed.

'We're on a spacecraft filled with representatives of various alien races. You never know what or who might be beeping around here. We'd better find the Stranger before something happens', the Doctor walked in the direction where the Roaming Voice had fled.

Time passed but the water didn't decrease. It only continued to flood. And now all the passengers were splashing. Some of them were going to complain about the non-observance of sanitary standards and the malfunctioning of the vessel. Others were looking forward to some kind of surprise supposedly included in the entertainment program.

Martha and Jack were listening to all that and hypothesising.   
The Doctor clung to everything around trying to find the Stranger. Here there were the disgruntled Sontarans, the enthusiastic pumpkin-like Froths, and there was a little Ťrift scurrying and throwing himself at everyone's feet with some strange device of his own.

The Stranger was still in the empty dark corridor. She didn't cry, it was just that the tears for some unknown reason came out of her eyes, leaving her bewildered. Something dreadful from within has covered the Stranger again.

Soon the Time Lady realised how silly her behaviour looked. She sighed heavily and straightened, staring at the salmon swimming in the aquarium.   
The Stranger walked away back to the hall where Captain, Nurse and the Doctor were waiting for her.

She was walking running her hand over the glass as Casanova would always do with his eternal habit of touching everything that could possibly be touched. It seemed that he felt calmer this way.   
Suddenly the Stranger noticed a tiny hole in the glass wall, from where the water was flowing in a small stream.

'Damn it!' the girl hesitated, trying to close the hole with her palm but after a few seconds standing like that she realised: 'That's all shit. Have to call the Doctor'

***

'Stranger!' exclaimed the Doctor in surprise.

The Time Lady frowned in concentration and, without looking down, scooped up water from the floor with her hand and washed her face with it.

'Well, at least you didn't drink it', muttered the Doctor.

'Water?' the Stranger was confused, 'Water. Why did you spill water?'

'Yup, everything's in the water. It's even ankle-deep to me. And you didn't even notice?' Martha was surprised.

'Well, I might be inattentive sometimes...'

'The fact that the Stranger doesn't even understand the concept of being attentive is not our main problem', the Doctor interrupted and looked around, 'This is a fully mechanised ship with not a trace of any personnel. So why isn't the vessel fixing the problem itself? It must be prepared for all sort of excesses and accident emergencies'

'So then, something's wrong with the spacecraft itself', Marthe continued his thought, 'But the water comes from the fish tanks. And we are relatively safe because it's definitely not enough to flood the ship. And all the electrical stuff must be on top, that's how it always is, right?'

Jack smiled.

'Yep, you're right, we are completely safe. Unless...' the smile slowly disappeared from his face, 'Unless we consider that this vessel was rebuilt upside down and all the electronics are as close to the floor as possible'

'Well then, we're gonna die', concluded the Stranger with awkwardly odd optimism, 'Okay, at least the lighting shines from below, not from above — beautiful and unusual. Okay, it's worth this'

***BEEP***

The Doctor frowned when he heard this beeping again but then quickly returned to the problem. Suddenly having realised something he blurted:

'Martha. Jack. Stranger. Main computer. Now'

'Wait, what? Computer?' Martha was confused for a second. When she and Jack rushed after the Doctor the had already vanished in the crowd, 'Oh, he's always like that!'

'Thanks for waiting, by the way', the Stranger, completely out of breath, was running behind, 'Okay, this nerd can handle everything on his own as he usually does. If the one Time Lord has escaped, then the other takes everything on oneself', the Stranger beckoned the others to follow her, 'Come on, we have a hole to plug. And please stop panicking, it's just our lives that depend on it'

***

The Doctor didn't notice how he was left alone. The water level was reaching critical considering the electric system that could create a short circuit and kill everybody who was in the water. Which meant, everyone on the ship.   
By the way, the passengers started to worry and were scurrying and pacing back and forth only splashing the water. Any awkward move could be the last for everyone.

The Time Lord reached the farthest door of the spacecraft.

'Doors, doors, doors... I love doors: there's always something interesting behind them. Unless the door is made of wood. These ones are difficult to negotiate with', the Doctor pointed the Sonic at the iron gate and the passage opened.

It was a large dark room made entirely of monitors, wires and mechanical panels. It's worth noting that the room was completely sealed so that the electronics wouldn't be damaged by the water.

The Doctor touched the main computer, sniffed it, licked it. This gave a little, except after that he pulled out _a small bright blue hair_ from his mouth. With an unpleasant grimace, he tucked it into the pocket.   
Time Lord ran to the huge screen and began to tap on the keyboard, which was displayed as a hologram on the surface of the table.

'It's time to pump out the wa...' the monitor gave out an error. And then it displayed hundreds of incomprehensible letters and symbols.

The Doctor ran his eyes over them realising that the ship itself was out of order. Someone had uploaded the virus onto it even before the fooling began. Now it's clear for sure: **_the accident is not just an accident_**.

The Time Lord looked up and rushed away back to look for his friends.

***

'Here it is. The hole', the Stranger pointed at the even hole in the glass wall, from which the water was flowing in a stream.

'So all the problems are just because of this one?' Martha said surprised.

'Tiny problems — huge consequences', the Stranger shrugged sarcastically, 'Come on, Captain, do something, don't be a useless idiot!'

'Woah, lady, you were nicer in the very beginning'

'I'm trying to fit the situation and your stupid look'

***BEEP***

'Do I look like the one who always carries putty with oneself or something like that?' Jack shrugged. The Stranger gave him a quick glance.

'Yes'

'Well, by the way, I do have one. Something similar — I think that'll do'

Jack brightened up and pulled a pen-like device out of his pocket.

'Well, it's not actually a putty. Rather a very dense foam, which, when interacting with the environment...'

'Just do it!' the Stranger interrupted.

'Okay-okay, got that. Women are so fussy'

Jack directed a thin stream of grey matter at the hole in the wall. This blot quickly hardened resembling concrete.

'Done!' captain Harkness said proudly, 'But it's better to get the ship to the nearest planet as soon as possible. This thing will be enough only for a couple of hours'

'Okay, we've handled this one', Martha agreed, 'But the main problem is still at our feet!'

Jack put his hand on Martha's shoulder and smiled cheerfully.

'I'm sure the Doctor has already figured out how to get rid of the water. He's a big head, always knows everything'

***

'I know nothing', said the Doctor desperately, 'I was at the main computer. There's a virus, so the security system is out of order. I could try to hack it but this would take time'

'And time is exactly what we are short of', added Martha.

'Plus while we fix one problem this mysterious intruder will do something else', Jack said.

'And this time the oxygen supply may suffer'

'Okay, then we're gonna act quickly and insensible. The best strategy', the Doctor glanced over the crowd of passengers, who were chaotically scurrying back and forth, never ceasing to grumble.

The Time Lord walked quickly towards the stage, having grabbed the Stranger by the hand:   
'You will help'

The Doctor was looking into the face of every alien. His thoughts were confused.   
He didn't let go of the Stranger, who was perplexedly trying to keep up with him, crashing into everyone they met on their way.

'Why the hell did you even drag me with you?'

'You are my talisman'

"And Jack interacts with you too often", the Doctor added in mind.   
The Time Lords ran to the stage. The Doctor tried to spot each of this numerous crowd below.

'Who makes such big spaceships? I remember in yeas 289...'

'No time for nostalgia', the Stranger looked at how everyone was unconsciously creating waves and splashes, each of which could easily kill everyone on board.

She swallowed nervously. The Doctor ran his eyes through the crowd and went through all possible options in his head.

'I lied. There is a way to drain the vessel', he began. The Stranger immediately didn't like his doomed tone, 'There is a module. It would be possible to pump all the water in there and open the doors into space but... Due to program failures, this would have to be done manually. Someone'll have to stay locked inside to activate the pump and open the module to the outside.

' _But this is **certain death**!_ Either drоwn or die in outer space'

'You don't have to worry about that. _I'll fix it_ ', he ruffled his hair and closed his eyes, 'A blue hair... It couldn't be in the control room. There shouldn't be a living soul. Computer virus. Many ancient symbols. The attack on the ship. Why? What for? Who?'

'Dunno, but he acted spontaneously. Not a single normal killer would spend so much time and make such an effort. And definitely, he wouldn't try to drown us in a fish tank. That Aquaman-recidivist!

***BEEP***

The Doctor suddenly realised something. The pieces finally began to fit. A hypothesis appeared in his head and it had to be urgently checked.

'Knock-knock', he said loudly not taking his eyes of the crowd.

'What?' the Stranger didn't understand, 'Have you gone completely crazy in your old age?'

'Knock-knock', repeated the Doctor more emphatically.

'Okay, right, let it be. But if these words are written on my tombstone I'll rise from the dead to kill you again.   
Who's there?'

'Doctor'

' _Doctor Who_?' the Stranger froze in a second and then burst out laughing, 'Ha, okay, funny! I got that!'

***BEEP***

The Doctor rapidly rushed to the source of the sound. Fortunately, it was not far from Martha and Jack, who followed the Time Lords.   
A small green creature with blue fur around his neck, with his the only eye, was following the Doctor's actions and fumbling with tentacles rushed away.

'Not so fast!' Jack aimed with an already used device and hit the creature directly in the tentacles. The grey substance instantly froze, pinning the fugitive firmly to the floor.

***

The Doctor squatted down in front of the alien.

'And how didn't I notice you from the very beginning? A race of arrogant nazis who decide the fate of living being by their level of intelligence. I heard of you but hoped I'd never meet any. And this is the very device that reacts to any uttered stupidity?'

'How dare you!' The alien screamed in a nasty voice, 'My detector worked on all of your stupid phrases and jokes. It showed that your intelligence was not reaching the norm. You've defiled me and everyone on this spacecraft. Now we all have to perish so that the Universe becomes purer and more perfect! Purification! We need cleaning!

The Doctor realised it was useless to talk to the creature. It believed what it wanted to believe.

'Doctor, the water...' Martha pulled the Time Lord out of his thoughts.

'Right! The water', the Doctor hesitated looking around, ' _Where's the Stranger?_ ' he asked barely audibly.

'Ugh? Who? Ah, that girl I came for? We never found her...' began Jack perplexedly by the Doctor interrupted him.

'Stranger? Has anyone seen the Stranger? Stranger!' the Time Lord opened his eyes wide realising where she could have disappeared and jerked away.

'No way. You are not leaving me alone again. And definitely not because of this... Argh!' Martha rushed after him.

'Wait, so the Roaming Voice and the Stranger are... The same person?' Jack Harkness finally got that. He was about to run after them but he got surrounded by a crowd of indignant passengers.   
They attacked him with questions and complaints. For some reason, they mistook him either for a representative of the vessel or for a worker.

***

The Doctor was running fast, ignoring Martha, who was following him. Big halls were over and now the Time Lord was winding through the auxiliary modules and dark corridors. He nearly crashed into the last but one door and pointed the Sonic at it.

'Doctor, explain: what's going on?' Martha asked worriedly.

He didn't answer. He was only muttering indistinctly: 'Come on... Come on'   
No sooner the passage had fully opened, the Doctor already got through it.

Finally the last door. The heavy metal door with a round porthole to the module. And this door was fully hermetically closed.

'Stranger!' the Doctor leaned to the glass window seeing the Time Lady, although he would be glad to be wrong.

The Stranger was standing there completely alone, excitedly looking at the mechanism that she was about to start.

'Don't you dare! Get out of there now!' the Doctor nervously tagged the tightly locked door, 'We'll find a way out! Do you hear me? Just give me some time!' he kicked the door, gritting his teeth and breathing heavily, 'Just give me time!' the Time Lord pointed the screwdriver at the door but it treacherously didn't give in.

' _Time..._ ' repeated the Stranger, 'That's even funny that we, the Lords of Time, miss it so often', she uttered in calm doom and pressed the big button. The sluices opened and the water started flooding the room.

'Turn everything off! Come out! It's me who should be there! Or Jack. Where's he?!'

'You know, I've always wanted to die beautifully. Maybe, this is my chance?' the Stranger came closer to the window, 'Doctor, have you seen the "Titanic" ?'

'What?.. Ah, no, I haven't been to that year, but why..'

'No, I mean the film, you stupid! With Leo Di Caprio and that one, what was her name.. So have you watched the film?' the Stranger glanced at the water that was rapidly filling the module.

'No, I haven't'

'Pity. Doctor, I **_promise_** , when this is all over, you and I will definitely sit together and watch the "Titanic" ', the Stranger looked at the Doctor with her sad endlessly purple eyes reflecting the cosmic space, 'And one more thing...', she put her hand on the glass. The Doctor did the same on the other side. The Stranger smiled sadly and said, **' _Four hearts for the two of us._** _And try not to forget me at least this time_ '

With these words, the Tima Lady moved away from the glass, took out her Sonic and turned to the passengers of the ship:

'Dear passengers! Ladies, gentlemen and other options — attention, please.   
We gladly inform you that all the temporal problems will be fixed in a short time. We apologise for the inconvenience. Thank you for your patience and understanding. And for now, you are given a unique opportunity to hear the last trill of the Roaming Voice. Have a nice trip!'

The Stranger turned on the music. The water was already up to her waist but she began to sing. It was a tune from the "Titanic".   
The water continued to rise but the lady didn't pay any attention to it.

> _You're here, there's nothing I fear  
>  And I know that my heart will go on._

The Doctor was watching unable to look away. He was beating helplessly against the glass.

> _We'll stay, forever this way  
>  You are safe in my heart   
> And my heart will go on and on._

When the water had already covered the Stranger, filling the entire room, the Time Lady directed her screwdriver up. The escape hatch opened and, together with the mass of water, she was thrown into the void of endless space.

'Noooo!' the Doctor yelled, 'No, no, no...' he slumped exhaustedly along the wall to the floor.

Singing was still her everywhere. 'The echoes', the Doctor thought, 'This happens when the technique fails. The person is no longer here but the voice still lingers as if alive'   
Martha timidly approached him and sat down next to him, putting her hand on his shoulder.

***

The Time Lord returned to the hall. Endless pain was lurking in his stern gaze. He heard one of the passengers laughing at the absurdity of the situation.   
Someone was indignant that he had wasted money on a microchip with the songs of the Roaming Voice for five years ahead.

'You...' the Doctor hissed with hatred seeing the little alien still under the control of Jack Harkness, 'This is all your fault!' he lunged at the pathetic green creature but was immediately stopped by Jack.

'Just don't. He's not worth it'

'I know. The ones like him are not worth anything at all', growled the Doctor, 'You. Your race. Consider yourselves better than the others. You decide who lives and who dies. Measuring intelligence with some kind of machine. **_You disgust me_** ', the Doctor shoved Jack aside, staring heavily at the green alien and strode into the TARDIS.

'She's gone', the Doctor uttered, 'She gave her life for those who didn't even know about the danger. They don't even know to whom and for what they should be grateful. So unfair!..' he entered the blue box.

Martha felt relieved just for a moment.   
She felt pleased that there was no more of this annoying and arrogant space girl. There was no one to steal the attention of everyone with no visible reason.   
But then the girl felt contempt for herself. Well, how can one be happy about someone's death!

Martha Jones had something to think over.   
And for a long time, the song from the "Titanic" was playing on repeat in the TARDIS.


End file.
